“Well, You Might Be a Liberal”
OK, enough of this serious stuff, I mean, heck, it’s my first day back from vacation! Why so serious on the first day back? I haven’t the foggiest. So to lighten the mood, I got these jokes for ya.
In the spirit of Jeff Foxworthy I’ve got a few “you might be a Liberal” jokes.
If your Merlot comes in a 25oz glass bottle but won’t allow your kids to buy a 20oz Diet Coke, you might be a liberal.
If you believe that children can’t bring cupcakes to school, but it’s OK for schools to take your child to an abortion clinic, you might be a liberal.
If you oppose capital punishment but support abortion, you might be a liberal.
If you think the independent minds of an all volunteer military are brainwashed by the “conservative machine”, but the turds of the occupy movement who think life owes them a free house, food, college, & medical care aren’t… Well, you might be a liberal.
If you think its okay to claim you support middle America, but you willingly give jobs to illegal aliens over American Labor because it’s cheaper, you might be a liberal.
If you think stopping Canadian oil from coming to the US by protesting the pipeline is better than Canada shipping it to China is “a good thing,” you might be a liberal.
If you cheered when a reporter threw a shoe at Bush, but you booed when a reporter threw a tough question at Obama, you might be a liberal.
If you go to a dinner and pay several thousand dollars to listen to the President complain about the wealthy not helping the poor, then you might be a liberal.
If you hate capitalism but expect a capitalist to provide you a good paying job with great benefits, you might be a liberal.
If you never feel shame for taking from others without their permission, you might be a liberal.
If you believe executing guilty murderers is wrong, but executing the innocent preborn is right, you might be a liberal.
If you think the Republicans are waging war on women while you ignore how Muslims torture and kill women for “honor,” you might be a liberal.
Well, that was fun. If you can come up with more, feel free to send them in.